Choices
by hug-me
Summary: 17 year old Alexis lets off some steam in the wrong way. AU established Castle family fluff! Read and review:
1. Chapter 1

Her body language gave away few clues that she was angry. She sat completely still in that cold, intimidating room, looking almost relaxed. Her arms were loosely crossed over her chest and she was leaning all the way back in her chair. It was only because Alexis had come to know her so well that she knew just how angry the detective was. It was all in the eyes; they were the most daunting, the most telling as to what the woman was feeling and of what was about to erupt. They bore into Alexis with such force that she said a silent prayer to the ground to open up and swallow her whole. Or at least help her come up with some kind of reasonable, believable excuse to her actions of the last 10 hours or so.

The model daughter, the straight A receiving, sensible young woman had experienced some of the teenage rebellion that her father had believed that she had bypassed, that somehow she had managed to glide through these years without even a mild curiosity in exploring the limits of her boundaries; not that there were many in the first place. She had finally done something a normal 17 year old would do, which made it even worse; it was completely out of character so therefore very hard to excuse, and very hard to explain why. Hence why she was sitting in the break room, of the 12th precinct, with the detective she had come to view as an almost surrogate mother since she had started dating her dad, staring her down, sweating her out, almost taunting the girl to dare to say something that would start the ball rolling.

In the end, Alexis couldn't take it any longer.

"I'm sorry" she mumbled, her voice cracking with emotion. She had been looking down at her hands, but could feel the shift in the room, could feel those blazing eyes on the top of her head.

Kate let out a sigh. She was angry, very angry, but those two words worked to melt her resolve a little; they were said by a Castle after all.

"Alexis, you are the smartest, most level headed, thoughtful girl I know, which is why I am so shocked that you would even _think_ of doing something like this. What the hell was going through your head?" She had started in a heart-felt tone, but ended in a hiss. Yep, the majority of the anger was still very much there.

Alexis had chanced a look up at Kate's face at the start, but had immediately gone back to studying her hands by the end. Oh she had heard Kate angry before, her dad was constantly getting into trouble, but never had any of it been directed towards her. This was new territory for both of them. A part of Alexis wanted to stand up defiantly, accuse Kate of having no authority over her, and storm out. That would have been easier if she hadn't broken the law, and if she actually believed that that was how she felt. She had come to see Kate as close to a mother figure as anyone had ever been to her, including Meredith. Kate had been a constant in her life for a number of years now. She had laughed with her at Castle's stupid antics, cried with her over break-ups, listened to her vent her problems at 1am, talked about growing up, and even helped on the odd bit of French homework. She had dried her tears, stood up for her freedom in front of Castle, and been there in the audience of her school production. Yes, she had encompassed the role of mother, without it ever being spoken about or openly acknowledged. It was a natural, comfortable arrangement.

Of course there had been times, especially at the start of the relationship between Castle and the detective, where Alexis had been hostile, and downright rude towards Kate. How dare she come in and make claim to her dad? Of completely blinding him of everything else in his life? Of making him run into situations that could rip him from her every day? 'Teething issues' is what they called it in their family; Alexis was having to make room for another woman in her dad's life, and her own. But now Kate was there, Alexis couldn't imagine life without her. Perhaps this was why she felt so incredibly guilty for being in the position she found herself in. This woman, who had voluntarily filled a hole in Alexis's life, would surely be regretting it now.

"Answer me, Alexis". The stern, interrogating, no-room-for-questions tone snapped Alexis back into the room and away from her thoughts. She looked back up and found Kate had leaned forward, closing in on her prey.

"I don't know. It just, sort of, happened." She weakly tried to explain. But this only added fuel to the fire.

"Don't you dare lie to me, you are in enough trouble as it is. Now, try again."

Alexis could feel anger building up inside her, a hot headed moment that her dad explains is because of her bright red-hair; a fierce temper when needed.

"I'm NOT lying. I really don't know. We were just hanging out at Paige's and then she got a text from her boyfriend asking us if we wanted to go to a party, and then the next thing I knew we were at this guy's apartment and..." She trailed off, knowing full well that Kate was well aware of the rest.

"I knew it was wrong but I didn't have a choice!" She tried to justify.

"Of course you had a choice. You always have a choice!" Kate slammed her palm down on the table in frustration. "This is the problem Alexis, you made a number of bad choices that led you to this moment. You _chose_ these friends that obviously are no good, you _chose_ to go to that party, you _chose_ to drink alcohol, you _chose_ to break the law." Kate had stood up and was now pacing the area in front of the young women.

She came to a stop directly in front of Alexis, her hands having found their way to her hips, and with a look of exasperation and disappointment. "I don't know what to say to you right now. You are very lucky that Ryan and Esposito were the ones that answered the disturbance call, if any other cop went you would be in a holding cell right now."

"I know" Alexis whispered, not sure whether to be pleased that it had indeed been the boys that had shut down the party. If it hadn't have been them then she wouldn't be having this awful encounter right now, but then she knew it would have happened eventually. The look on Esposito's face when he had seen her straddling some guy's lap, holding a red cup, lips and other hand busy, had frozen her in place and her stomach do a back flip, before she was forcibly dragged off of him and out the door. If she had gotten around to drinking more then perhaps that particular moment would be, thankfully, hazy! Unfortunately for Alexis, she had only been on her second cup of the sticky, fruity, yet extremely strong, mixture, so hadn't had the chance to reach that stage.

"There is something going on with you Alexis. You have never done anything like this before, and while I understand the need to let off some steam as a teenager, this was not the way to go about it. Even more so when both your Dad and I are directly involved in law enforcement! So please, tell me why." Kate had sat back down, her voice still leaving no doubt that Alexis was supposed to answer, but concern was mixed in there too.

"I just…" she started but couldn't finish. Not knowing how to say the words, or even how to put her feelings into a logical reason. It all seemed so stupid now. The feelings that she had been trying to suppress over the last couple of weeks had all come to a boiling point that night, and she just needed a release.

"This is about the recent development in our lives, isn't it?"

Right in one. It was posed as a question but both of them were well aware that it wasn't one. Kate knew the minute Esposito had called her from the car to tell her who was sitting in the back seat. Alexis refused to look up from her hands but gave a semi-shrug of her shoulders, silently confirming Kate's theory.

"Honey, things are always going to change. It is a part of life that nothing can stay the same. I thought you were happy that I was pregnant?" Kate had full on shifted into concerned, sympathetic mode.

"I was. I am! Really Kate, I can't wait to have a baby brother or sister. I just…arrghh, I don't know what I feel." Alexis was so full of frustration. A damn had been broken and she just let her mouth move, expressing all the dis-jointed thoughts that were spilling out.

"Do you know how often I begged Dad for a sibling when I was little? I wanted one my whole life, a playmate. But then, as I got older I realized I loved having him all to myself. He was mine and only mine. He was my whole world, and I was his whole world. Then you came along and I was mad. So mad at you. I hated you for ruining that" She whispered this last part. They both knew that that was true, as they had already gone through this before, but Alexis was still embarrassed by it.

Kate gave her an apologetic smile. Those first few months of their relationship had been rocky. A hostile teenager is not one to be messed with, but they had gotten through it and had formed a tight bond because of it.

"And then I learned to accept you, then like you, and then love you like a mom. The three of us had formed a family that I thought I would never get. But now, you are both going to have something that I can't be a part of, and I am just going to be pushed to the side, especially when I go off to college…who am I going to be? The visiting relation who pops by every now and again? That baby is going to have you both as parents, and my Dad will have a new center to his world, and you are going to have your own child." Alexis was in tears, face red with frustration, embarrassment and the alcohol in her system.

Kate had moved round to sit beside Alexis now. She enveloped her in her arms and let her cry, while murmuring comforting words to her. They sat like that for a while, waiting for the tears to decrease. When they had been reduced to sniffles, Kate pulled her back with her hands on the sides of her arms to face her.

"Alexis, that will never, ever happen. Your Dad loves you more than life itself. Yes, he will love this baby as much as you, but you will never be pushed out, never not welcome, and never not included in this family, I promise you." She shook the girl by the shoulders a little to drive home her point.

"And as for you and me, you will always be my first child, regardless of having different blood in our veins. You should know this by now. But I know you Castle's need reassurance of this so I am telling you now, and I will tell you again; I love you Alexis, and nothing will change that. You hear me?"

A new round of tears burst forward from Alexis as she collapsed into the detective again. She didn't care she was almost an adult; she just needed to be held by her mother figure and told that everything would be ok.

Kate gently stroked her red hair, and sighed to herself. It hurt her so much that this girl had such little trust in her, and in people in general; that they would always leave. It made her want to hunt Meredith down and hurt her. She knew people who would willingly hide any evidence that could trace anything back to her! But, for now, her imagination would have to do.

Alexis had calmed down again and Kate knew that they were not finished, unfortunately. She had just told this girl that she would always be there for her, always be the mother that she had never had. Now this was the time to prove that. A part of her wanted to let everything slide because of all the emotions that Alexis had been put through, but she knew what she had to do. For Alexis's sake.

"Now we have that out of the way, we need to have a serious conversation about your actions tonight." Her authoritative, detective voice was back and Alexis immediately went very still. Kate pulled them both up into a sitting position, but Alexis's eyes were trained anywhere but at Kate.

"Look at me Alexis." Kate ordered.

Ice blue met brown with a mix of anxiousness and fear.

"I get that you were upset. You had a right to be. But that was NOT how you should have handled it. For starters, you lied about where you were, you drank under age when I know you know how dangerous that can be, not to mention the position the boys found you in" Alexis's face turned bright red at the knowing and disappointing look Kate was giving her.

"You need to have respect for yourself Alexis, no matter how much you wanted to let go, or get back at your Dad or me, which I am guessing was a part of it was it not?"

It was a rhetorical question so Alexis felt no need to either confirm or deny the claim. Again, she whispered an apology. Kate stared at the girl in front of her, obviously trying to decide on how best to continue. She decided on the way her own mother handled a similar situation with a young Kate. With some steel, and resolution in her voice that left no room for argument she sealed the girl's fate.

"You're grounded for a week."

Alexis's head shot up and opened her mouth to protest. But snapped it shut. She wanted to protest that it wasn't fair, she barely drank anything, but she knew how much of a turning point this had been. Her Dad had never grounded her before, he had never had a reason to, but here was someone who cared and loved her enough to make her accountable for her actions. She still possessed her logical, adult mind, even if was mixed in with a usual teenage one at times. And after all, a week was pretty lenient!

Kate studied the girl, waiting for an argument, waiting for her yelling, waiting for her to storm out, but none came. Alexis gave her a curt nod, and even a weak smile. Then a look of horror crossed her face.

"Oh my God, please don't tell Dad, he will kill me!"

Kate suppressed a laugh.

"I highly doubt that Alexis, and no, I won't tell him."

Relief washed over the young Castle.

"But you will."

"What? No I can't, please don't make me" she begged.

"Honestly honey, did you think he wouldn't find out? How else are you going to explain to him why you aren't using your laptop, or your phone? And I am not going to lie for you." Kate found Alexis's reaction highly amusing, what had she expected her to say!

Alexis's shoulder slumped forward in resignation. "Ok, but can you please be with me when I do, you know, just in case you need to jump in front of me in protection, or something?"

Kate laughed and assured the girl that she would be there to restrain if necessary.

"Speaking of Castle, we should be getting home. He is bound to be pacing the loft seeing as it's nearly midnight and I'm not back yet!"

Alexis sighed and got to her feet. She looked physically and emotionally drained. Kate decided to take a bit of pity on her; after all, the explanations were going to have to start when Castle saw them arrive home together.

"Come on, before you aren't allowed to see the light of day for the next week, let's go get a milkshake."

"Can we get some fries too, I haven't eaten anything since lunch, and well, I could do with something lining my stomach if I am going to be on stale bread and jelly for a while" Alexis joked.

Kate put her arm around the young girls shoulder, and kissed the top of her head.

"Love you kid. But the next time this happens, I'm going to let them throw you in a cell for a night. Understood?"

"I may beg you to do that tonight once Dad knows!"

End.

So, I don't know where this came from! I just needed some Castle family fluff in my life! Obviously this is very AU, as I put Castle and Kate together from when Alexis was probably around 14.

As a disclaimer, none of these characters are mine, because if they were, we wouldn't be on 4x20 and had no action yet!

Please review and let me know what you think


	2. Chapter 2

Kate pulled into her spot next to Castle's Ferrari, rolling her eyes at it again like she does every day. It never stops being too obnoxious for her taste! After her and Alexis had left the precinct, they stopped at Remy's for a burger and milkshake, the latter of which was reaching the dregs at the bottom as they had slurped their way home. Alexis had gotten quieter, the closer they got to the loft, absently fiddling with the button on the sleeve of her jacket. She couldn't remember the last time she had done anything to warrant being fearful of her dad. Sure, they had argued in their own Castle way, but this time she had actually done wrong, and she couldn't predict how he was going to react.

Kate shut off the ignition, and turned to look at the nervous girl sitting next to her. She could feel the waves of anxiety rippling off of her and knew that she needed to say something.

While letting out a sigh, she said "Come on, let's get this over with."

Alexis, looking paler by the second, tried another round of pleading.

"Please Kate, I will tell him, just not right now. I feel so exhausted and my head is pounding." It came out as a whine but at that moment she was desperate.

Kate raised an eyebrow, "You have that headache because of the alcohol so you are getting no sympathy from me on that front."

Alexis closed her eyes and leaned her head back on the headrest, trying to stem the tears that were threatening to fall. She ran a hand through her red hair that was tangled and sticky at the ends, and brought her head round to look at the detective. She could see that Kate was not going to back down and she was too tired to fight when she knew she could never win.

"Ok, let's go" giving a weak smile. Kate smiled sensitively back and put her hands on top of the young girls in reassurance.

"Honey it will be fine. Yes, he is going to be angry, and he has a right to be. But he isn't going to kill you! Besides, I have my gun right here just in case things get out of hand" she said with a wink. Alexis snorted a brief laugh.

They both got out of the car and made their way to the elevator up to the loft apartment that the Kate had moved into the year before. It felt more like home to her than any other place she had lived in as an adult. She had loved her apartment, she had loved the solitude of it, but after experiencing life in such a loud, loving environment like the Castle's, she no longer wanted to be alone. She knew that each family has ups and downs, and this was definitely a down moment, but if there is anything that she had learned in the time she had been with Castle, is that there was always forgiveness, no matter what. She of course was worried about what her partner's reaction would be; he always held his daughter up on such a high pedestal, and it was hard to see them fall. Kate just hoped that he would remain calm and not freak out like she has seen him do in the past when something had happened to Alexis; a bad break up with a boyfriend for example. At least then his anger had been directed at the boy as opposed to Alexis.

Throughout this internal monologue, they had reached the front door of the loft. Alexis paused, waiting for Kate to make the first move. Kate took it. She squeezed the girls hand and then let them in.

Sorry that this was so much shorter than the last chapter! I'm not sure what is better; shorter chapters and quicker updates, or longer chapters. Anyway, please review and I will try and get the next chapter up as soon as possible!


	3. Chapter 3

Castle was feeling pretty relaxed. He had had a very productive afternoon writing Nikki and Rook out of a hostage situation in a gym of all places, which meant Gina was off his back for at least the next 24 hours. A beer in one hand, TV remote in the other, he was flicking every so often between mindless reality shows, that he would never admit to actually liking, to sports, to infomercials. He was just in the process of reaching for his cell to order the brand new state of the art waffle iron in the shape of Darth Vader's head when he heard keys in the front door.

"Hi babe, you're late home," he called out while trying desperately to type the number into the phone before all of the waffle irons were sold.

Kate rolled her eyes. She hated that particular pet name, and he knew it, but when did that ever stop him? It either slipped out when he wasn't paying attention, like now, or he purposefully used it to rile her up, with the pretence of being on the receiving end of retribution later.

"Yeah, something a bit unusual came up tonight" she replied while fixing Alexis with a look as she saw the girl edging for the staircase, who was aware that Castle had yet to notice her.

Castle barked out a laugh, "Unusual? Last week you had a guy dressed as a clown who had been strangled with a deflated balloon, by a rival clown I might add, and you waited three days to tell me. Must be pretty special for you to call this case unusual! Oh crap." He had missed his chance at the waffle iron and with a huff, threw his phone down on the sofa next to him.

"Well this was something a little more personal" Kate replied. Her hard tone caught his attention and he finally shifted his focus towards the door.

He took in the scene before him; Kate with her arms folded, a tired yet steeled look on her face, and Alexis, hovering somewhere near the stairs wearing clothes that she certainly didn't have on when she left, make-up strewn down her face, and refusing to look at either adult. A frown furrowed his brow as warning bells started ringing in his head.

"Alexis? What are you doing home? I thought you were staying at Paige's."

"I was, but…." She trailed off, and looked to Kate. She wasn't scared of her father exactly, she was just very unsure of how he would react. He had done stupid things in the past, and they laughed about it. Maybe he will see the funny side? Perhaps not.

Sighing, Kate turned to look at Castle. She dropped her bags on the floor and headed for the sofa. She had intended on getting Alexis to tell him but knew that they could be there all night waiting if left to her own devices.

"It turns out that her plans had to change when some cops, Ryan and Espo included, busted an underage party in Queens." She saw the moment the dots connected for him. His eyes became hard and his lips pressed into a thin line. He snapped his head towards his daughter.

"Alexis! You were _arrested_?!" He leant forward in his seat, almost slamming the beer onto the table in front of him.

Under his scrutiny, Alexis shifted her weight from foot to foot, trying to come up with something to say to make her situation a little better.

"It wasn't really a proper arrest, more they just gave me a ride home if you think about it," was what she came up with. Castle didn't appreciate the joke. He was on his feet now, a strong burst of parental anger coursing through him. He had rarely ever been angry towards his daughter, and never like this.

"I can't believe this. You were arrested? By Ryan and Esposito no less! What the hell were you doing at a party like that, and drinking, I imagine? "

"I only had two drinks, it's not a big deal Dad" Alexis tried to defend herself, suddenly feeling very tired of talking about this with both Kate and now having to go through him.

"I don't care if it was just one sip. You are seventeen years old, you shouldn't even be smelling alcohol!"

"Oh come on Dad that is a little extreme, or are you now saying that I can't be around Gram, or you?" She scoffed while waving her hand at the half full beer bottle.

"Don't twist my words Alexis, it is you in the wrong here." His voice taking on a low, menacing quality.

"At least I still have my clothes on, and wasn't riding a stolen police horse" she shot back, her mouth working before her brain could stop it.

Castle's face started to turn red and he took a step towards her. He could not understand where this attitude was coming from, and certainly not her actions.

He felt Kate's hand on his arm, in a silent warning of 'careful'. She knew that this was new to him and she didn't want to have to actually use her gun! She decided that Alexis was too emotional and it was too late for them to be rational about this.

"Alexis, that's enough. I think you should go to your room and we will talk about this tomorrow when everyone has cooled off" she ordered.

The red head gave a brief nod, and with one last defiant glare at her father, retreated to her room. Castle ran his hands down his face and slumped back onto the sofa, looking like a beaten father of a teenage daughter. Kate had seen that look on her own father's face, and it wasn't until now that she fully appreciated the pain and anguish that caused it. Tomorrow she will give Jim a ring and apologise for her wild child phase!

Walking behind the sofa, she ran her hands down Castle's arms and rested her head into the crook of his neck, placing a gentle kiss there.

"What just happened Kate?" he sighed.

"You just met some teenage rebellion, and if you ask me, you have been very lucky to have avoided it for this long" she said.

"I know, I know. I mean we have had our spats and some attitude but never anything like that. She was arrested Kate!" He was so lost, and she moved back round to join him. She leant back into his chest, his arms coming around her, probably to comfort himself. He likes cuddling and she is happy to oblige after a day like today.

"She was Castle yes, but everything is fine. There are no charges, I was there, and she didn't even step inside of a cell."

He hummed in response but sounded anything but placated.

"That doesn't mean that she should get off scott free though. God, I don't even know how to punish my own daughter. Yes, when she was little, boy could she throw a tantrum but just shutting her in her room, or taking away a toy would do it. Hell she even grounded herself for jumping a turnstile when I wanted to give her ice-cream!"

Kate bit her lip and angled her face towards him.

"I grounded her. For a week." She admitted, waiting for his reaction. When she had punished Alexis, she wasn't sure if she was over-stepping but in the moment it seemed like the right thing to do.

Castle's eyes widened, pushing her away gently to look at her.

"You did?" he said, sounding shocked, but a little awed.

"Yeah" she replied shyly, "If that isn't ok, I'm sorry! I mean, it should be up to you. It just seemed right, she was looking at me like her mom and I couldn't let her down"

"No no, God…I just…. I love you for loving my daughter enough to do that." He pulled her back against his chest in a crushing embrace.

"Thank you," he whispered in her ear, and pressed a light kiss to her lips.

"You are thanking me? For grounding your daughter?" She was very confused.

"You are an amazing woman, and an amazing Mom, even before your first." He gently lay a hand on her slightly protruding stomach.

"Not technically my first" she smiled and laced her hand with his.

"Come on Rick, you look like you need some rest, especially as you have to _calmly _talk to Alexis tomorrow."

Kate made to get up and with a deep sigh, Castle pulled himself up to, their hands still inter-twined.

"Ok, but I think you need to give me a confidence boost before then babe, I feel like I have lost my touch on the parental side tonight and could do with some reassurance," he sighed as he gave her a sly smile.

She turned to glare at him but catching sight of the gleam in his eyes, she cocked an eyebrow.

"Oh I'm sure I can find some way to reassure you _daddy_" she replied with a sultry look, and pulled him towards the bedroom.


	4. Chapter 4

**Sorry for such a delay on this chapter! I intended to make this a Castle/Alexis discussion but it turned out a little different. I wanted to show how father and daughter were so alike but how that created the problem in the first place! The discussion will be in the next chapter, I promise. Please let me know what you think and if you have any suggestions :-)**

Castle woke up all hot and sweaty. First he thought that it was because of a bad dream, then he realised it was due to the fact that he had his own personal hot water bottle draped over him. Beckett was smooshed on the edge of his pillow, her brown hair swirled all around her head and tickling his neck, her face slightly tilted toward him. She had an arm and a leg thrown over his body, pinning him into the bed. He could feel the small puff of air on his cheek as she exhaled, still fast asleep. He turned his head to look down at her. He couldn't believe how lucky he was; how in love he felt. A soft smile graced his face, and then a full blown smirk when he realised both of them were completely naked; the white sheet had pooled at the bottom of the bed leaving them completely open to the elements.

The smirk quickly dropped when he remembered the events preceding their passion-filled night. Castle had asked Kate for a confidence boost, but really they both knew he just wanted a distraction. His blood was boiling because of his confrontation with Alexis, and there was only one way of diffusing it. Well, one way he wanted to anyway, and Beckett was more than willing to oblige!

Castle turned back to stare at the ceiling. What was he going to do about his daughter? He had never in a million years imagined that his little girl, his Alexis, would get arrested. She had always been a level headed, thoughtful, considerate child, and young adult. This was completely out of character. As a novelist he was always looking for the story, a motive. Things didn't just happen to people. A person doesn't suddenly wake up one morning and go kill a guy for the hell of it. The same way his daughter doesn't just wake up, lie to him, and get herself arrested for underage drinking.

Beside him, Beckett sighed and shifted so that she was no longer imprisoning him with her limbs and rolled over onto her back exposing her front to him. The early morning sunlight streamed in through the big windows, illuminating the two of them and giving her barely there baby bump a healthy looking glow. A light bulb literally pinged on in Castle's head. Baby bump; pregnancy; new child; Alexis. Dots started connecting, the storyline started taking shape, a motive becoming clearer. Was Alexis jealous? He ran a hand through his hair and left it behind his head, elbow out, pondering the question. He subconsciously was running his other hand slowly up and down Kate's arm.

She seemed happy when they had told her, albeit a little distant maybe. The grin didn't quite reach her eyes, her congratulations a bit flat. He frowned. He remembered all the times when she had been little and begged him for a sibling. It had broken her heart that he couldn't give one to her. Now he could. Castle really couldn't work it out, though the seed of doubt over her real thought about this baby had been planted. He needed to talk to her…calmly, rationally. More than that, he had to listen.

Castle lay there for another thirty minutes or so. It was early enough that he could still justify going back to sleep but his mind was working overtime. Kate was still sleeping peacefully beside him. At about 6.40am he heard movement in the kitchen and since Martha was in the Hamptons, he knew it could only be his daughter. It was now or never.

Quietly he slipped out of bed, found his boxers that had been unceremoniously tossed behind a chair last night, and wrapped his robe around the rest of him.

* * *

><p>After she had been effectively sent to her room by Kate, Alexis tossed and turned in bed. She was angry at her Dad, angry at Kate, and a little angry at herself. This day had not turned out how she expected. When she decided to go to that party, she just wanted to let off some steam; wanted a release, to forget about all the things that had been going round and round her head.<p>

Pregnancy, baby, family, herself, her Dad, Kate, love, forgotten, rejection, anger. Repeat.

She was happy for her Dad and Kate. Of course she was. They were in love, and she knew they both wanted a baby. She wanted a little sibling too. She could remember all the times when she was a little girl that she begged her Dad for a little sister to play with. All of her friends had one and it looked like so much fun! But then she came to realise how much she loved being an only child. She was the apple of her Dad's eye; it was him and her against the world. She got all the attention, all the praise, all the love, everything just from him. She never felt like she missed out on having a mother because her Dad was always there. Yes, Gina tried, but Alexis could tell that she wasn't that interested in her. None of her Dad's girlfriends had ever been.

Then Kate entered the picture. Well, Detective Beckett. Alexis had watched her Dad fall hard for her. Every day he would rush off to a crime scene or to the precinct, with a quick kiss on her forehead and a promise to be home for dinner. She loved that he was so passionate about something and how much happiness he got from whatever they were doing. But she also saw how broken he was when Beckett wouldn't return his feelings, or would turn up with another man to some function. God Alexis had hated her. She missed her Dad; her irresponsible, nine-year old father, whom she disciplined more than he did her! Alexis was no longer the center of his universe. It wasn't that she felt competition; she knew that she would win hands down. It was more that there was someone else that saw her Dad the way she did, who was wrapped around his little finger, who he wanted to spend every waking minute with.

After a lot of time, and a lot of patience on everyone's part, one thing led to another; Castle and Beckett finally got together, and Kate and Alexis finally started seeing eye to eye. A few coffee dates turned into a few shopping trips which turned into a friendship and then a hybrid of a mother/sister/daughter relationship. Alexis wasn't yet at the stage to start calling her Mom, but she could see herself saying it one day. It wasn't like she called anyone else it; Meredith had lost that title a long time ago.

There-in lay the problem. Alexis felt that she had finally gotten a mother figure, a strong female presence in her life, but wouldn't a baby of Kate's own change that? It must do. Alexis wasn't biologically Kate's, they hadn't even been very close for that long. Her Dad and Kate would be so caught up in the new baby that Alexis would surely get pushed aside, perhaps not intentionally but it was bound to happen. Then she felt so stupid for thinking like this, she was seventeen! All the other kids her age wanted to be as far away as possible from their mothers and here she was wanting the opposite.

Alexis knew the second that she arrived at that party that it was a wrong choice, but she just wanted to forget about all this family drama that was swirling around her head. Kate was so angry. Alexis had never seen her so angry, not at her anyway. There had been a few snaps, a few harsh words, and a few disapproving looks, but nothing to the level that she had experienced at the precinct earlier that day. A part of Alexis felt reassured that Kate got angry her and had grounded her, though she would never admit that. In a strange way, it showed that Kate cared. Now, she was terrified of her Dad. There had only been a handful of times in her life when he had ever been truly angry at her. This was different though. She had not only had made him extremely angry, but the disappointment she also saw in his eyes was worse. She could yell back at him when he yelled at her, but there wasn't much she could do about that look. She had to explain, but they both needed to be calm.

Speaking of calm, she had not slept a wink. Turning over to look at her clock she noticed the early morning sun starting to break through her blinds. Sighing, she rolled out of bed to make a cup of tea. She wasn't sleeping now and she never would, and she still wanted some time before she had to face the music so to speak. Alexis rubbed at her eyes and threw on a jumper before heading downstairs.


	5. Chapter 5

Alexis looked up from her mug of tea when she heard the study door open. Her stomach dropped to her feet. She quickly glanced at the staircase, weighing up whether she could make it upstairs before whoever it was saw her. Not a chance. She turned her attention back towards the study and saw her Dad making his way across the living room towards her. He stopped the other side of the breakfast bar so they were now facing each other. There was an awkward moment of silence.

"Hey," he quietly greeted her. "Couldn't sleep?"

Alexis focused on stirring her tea when she answered. "Not really. You?"

"My mind was too busy forming a story."

"A Nikki Heat story?"

"No, more like a Castle story. You know, I'm having a hard time getting the pieces of the puzzle fitting together," he told her, "perhaps you can help."

Alexis finally looked up into her father's deep blue eyes. They looked tired, dim, no trace of the sparkle that usually shines within them. She looked back down; the sugar would have dissolved a long time ago now.

"What's the story about?" she knew the answer to this but decided to play along. He worked in stories, and she could work in metaphors.

"It's about a beautiful, talented, smart princess, who for no reason does something completely out of character. I can't seem to connect the dots, to make the plot flow." Castle leaned forward and braced his arms on the counter, a look of mock confusion on his face, his brow furrowed.

Alexis shrugged, "Maybe she got tired of being a princess and just wanted to do something crazy for a change, forget who she was for a while. I'm sure it can be hard work being a princess."

"See that is where I am having the problem, why would she want to forget who she is? She is a pretty awesome princess normally. Everyone loves the princess."

"Perhaps she felt that she couldn't be that princess anymore; that everyone was moving on so she should too."

"Oh so she thought that the King was moving on?"

Again, Alexis shrugged. Castle was pleased that she was engaging with him but the storytelling had to stop now.

"Ok pumpkin, let's leave the fairytale and come sit down with me." He beckoned her over as he made his way to the couch. He plonked down on the right side, and when Alexis gingerly perched a good meter or so away, he reached out and pulled her into his side. She came willingly and curled up, resting her head on his chest.

"Why didn't you come and talk to me when you started feeling like this? I had no idea. You were happy about the pregnancy when we told you."

"What was I supposed to say? 'Oh Dad, your nearly-adult daughter is feeling jealous towards a foetus, do something about it.'"

Castle snorted, "Well no, not like that, but you could have said that you were having some doubts about it."

"I know, but I felt stupid and like I was some little kid. I didn't want to ruin how happy you and Kate were. " Alexis admitted.

"So instead you decided to drink and get arrested? That wasn't a smart choice Alexis. That didn't make me or Kate happy in the least, nor did it make you look smart or grown up."

She was picking at the edge of his robe, not knowing what to say. Although he was calm, the anger from earlier dissipated, his voice was laced with disappointment and that was the one thing she hated. He had rarely yelled at her, and when he did she could yell right back. But this disappointment cut her to the bone.

He took hold of her shoulders and pulled her back to look at her.

"While I understand how you feel, what you did last night was not okay. I don't think I have ever been as disappointed in you as I am right now."

This was hard for him. He had always taken such pride in the fact that his daughter was as close to perfect as anyone could get. She had been more the parent in their relationship but that didn't mean he couldn't stand up to the plate when he needed to. He was the adult, his child had done wrong, and even if he could see why it happened, he needed to be sure that it wouldn't happen again.

Tears were silently spilling from her eyes but she didn't look away. "I'm sorry daddy" she whispered.

He pulled her into a bone crushing hug. Alexis wrapped her arms around his neck and clung on, burying her face into him.

"I know honey, I know." He gently rocked backwards and forwards, like he used to do when she was little. This time it wasn't him comforting her when she fell over and scraped her knee. This time it was reassuring her that when she messed up, he still loved her.

"You are going to have a little brother or sister Alexis, and that baby will take up a lot of our time and attention, but that doesn't mean that you will be side lined. We will need and want you every step of the way. You will still be my first little girl; no one can take your place in my heart."

Alexis stayed in his arms until the tears had subsided. Castle continued to rub her back, kiss the top of her head, and whisper reassurances into her ear. He needed to make sure that his first baby was okay. Alexis pulled back after a while and wiped at her face.

"Don't you ever do something like that again, you hear me?" Castle told her as he rubbed his thumb under her eyes. "It scares me that you were arrested. You are very lucky that Kate, Javi and Kevin were there to get you, otherwise you would be facing a criminal record. Those are consequences that you do not want following you around. "

"I won't, I promise. If anything, I don't want to come face to face with Detective Beckett ever again; she is so much scarier than Kate!"

Castle chuckled, "She got all mother dearest on you I take it?"

"Yeah, it was weird. But also kind of nice, if that makes sense? She must care about me to yell at me, right?"

"Of course she does Alexis, she loves you." Castle genuinely appeared shocked that his daughter was questioning this. The thought hadn't crossed his mind before that Alexis may not feel stable in the pseudo mother/daughter relationship she has with Kate.

"Oh I know, just actions speak louder than words I suppose. You can't really know until the going gets tough."

"I hear she grounded you," he nudged at her side with a wink.

"Can you believe that? I mean, _you_ haven't even grounded me before!"

Castle got serious again, "I am this time Alexis. I'm going to add to that week she gave you. I have to be sure that you know how much you messed up."

"What? Dad, please I know, I do. A week is plenty," she begged.

"A week is not enough, and you know that Alexis. You grounded _yourself _for a week for jumping a turnstile, remember?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.

She sighed. She wasn't used to him playing the Dad card but he had always been fair.

"How long?"

Castle cocked his head to the side and pondered that. "Honestly? I don't know. I'm going to have to think about that, and talk to Kate about it. We will see in two weeks, and take it from there."

She gave a curt nod and leaned back on the couch. Castle ran his hand over the back of her head.

"I love you kiddo, even when you nearly give me a heart attack," he smiled softly at her. Alexis was pleased to see that his eyes were clearer and he seemed a lot calmer. It would take a while to earn his trust back, but the sparkle was returning.

"Well, you are getting old so it wouldn't take much to give you one of those," she replied cheekily. Before he had chance to grab at her sides, her most ticklish spot, she jumped up out of the way with a smirk. She made a dash for the stairs as he rose from the couch.

"I'm not beyond extending that grounding to a month, young lady," he yelled after her. He knew things weren't perfect, that he would have to keep an eye on his eldest to see how she was coping within their new family, but he knew everything will be okay. God help him with the next one though. Kate's stubbornness offspring and his over-excitedness all rolled into one tiny human may well do him in! He wasn't as young as he used to be.

**I think I am going to leave the Caskett angsty, family fluffiness here! I would love to hear what you think so please click that little review button and all the WELL-LIT Castkett kisses will magically appear on your screen;) **


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